We planned an unassisted birth with our third child after having 2 hospital births. During the pregnancy, I had made a birth plan that included delivering the way I want and no unnecessary meds. The dr that I ended up with was the one I didn’t like. She wouldn’t let me deliver upright and numbed the perineal area as I was shouting at her to leave me alone. Needless to say, I didn’t want to put myself under anyone elses control again.
We began researching home birth and eventually unassisted birth. After much prayer, we decided on an unassisted for the next pregnancy. I didn’t want to deal with the tests, etc. that I felt were based out of fear–and God has not given us a spirit of fear. I also don’t believe that anyone needs to be in that area of my body besides my dh.
Our decision caused quite a stir amongst family, friends and church family, but we stuck to it.
I went into labor with Cedrick on Sunday, starting with mild contractions in the morning during church. By 9 p.m., things had picked up and I had bloody show. I thought I’d have him sometime after midnight and we called those planning on attending the birth.
By Monday morning, things had slowed down from contractions every 3 minutes apart to every 10-20 minutes and I sent everyone but my mom and a close friend home. After everyone left, the contractions picked up and I was again in hard labor. Tuesday morning, the contractions stopped completely. During this whole time I was crying out to God. Chris, my husband, kept checking me and said I was fully dilated and the head was dropped in position. After praying, he felt he was to break my water, but I wouldn’t let him. We had confirmations of that from other people who called or were there.
On Tuesday night, after a few hours of medium contractions, I took castor oil hoping to start things moving again. Then I went to bed. The contractions continued all night, but I was so exhausted I slept soundly in between them and barely woke up during one.
On Wednesday morning, they slowed down again and we decided to go to the hospital. I thought we would get into trouble because we hadn’t had prenatal care, but they were better than I expected. The ER dr. couldn’t believe that I knew what I was talking about. The OB said my measurements were too small and sent me for an ultrasound. The u/s said the baby wouldn’t be due for another 4 weeks! They tried to get me to stop labor, but being 5 cm when they checked me, labor would not stop. We agreed to have my water broken and two hours later, Cedrick was born.
During my pregnancy and labor, I was in contact with a midwife friend. She felt that I was fully dilated and that when the labor stopped the cervix closed back up.
I was pretty disappointed that we didn’t have Cedrick at home, but God used this experience. It really drove home the Scriptural commandment to OBEY your husband. If I would have let him break my water Monday, Cedrick would have been born on Monday.
God used this to heal me of the emotional trauma of my second birth. This hospital birth, although under difficult circumstances, was the best one.
I am still planning on having an unassisted with the next one, if the Lord should bless us. We will have amnihooks in our birth kit this time, since that seems to be a recurring problem with me. (My water had to be broken for the other two as well). I will probably have some kind of prenatal care with the understanding that we want to do birth at home by ourselves (if I can
find someone who will agree to this). We probably won’t tell anyone what we are doing this time and won’t invite anyone. I think that there was some “negative” praying going on during labor. Also, it is easier to relax and let things happen if you don’t have “pressure to perform” because people are there to see a baby born.
I look forward to next time!